It’s a bit personal

My Dad died on my birthday 8 years ago. It was heartbreaking and wretched and for a long time I felt like the earth had given way beneath me and nothing was as it was supposed to be any more.

I didn’t mind that he died on my birthday. Some people said maybe he waited for such an occasion and others insisted it was just a coincidence but either way it didn’t really matter to me because I was just glad that the suffering was over for him. The fact that he died on my birthday will forever be special for me because if you are going to rip the centre out of someones life then it doesn’t really matter when you do it does it?

A number of my friends were very helpful to me through the difficult time proceeding his death. I still couldn’t begin to articulate who and how but suffice to say, we definitely rely on our connection with each other to get through this life. Some people gave me words and some gave me lasagna, other people gave me time and all of it helped in its own way.

Afterward I also spent a lot of time writing, first a book and then some poetry and I guess in some ways this blog came out of that time too.

I don’t miss my Dad as much today as I did 8 years ago and that is a good thing because my sadness was too much to carry for too long. But still, I occasionally have a moment where I think of him and it hurts all over again. This week I was listening to a podcast on “The Hidden Life of Trees” by Peter Wohlleben and I desperately felt the need to talk to my Dad about the wonderful idea that trees can talk to each other and they talk to us too.

Oh, how he would have been thrilled by that idea and I think he would have innately known it to be true, just as I did when I first heard of it.

So I guess this means that tomorrow is my birthday. At 39 I am starting to become slightly less excited about the whole birthday caper than I once was. Add to this fact that it has been an unusual week at my house with sick children and interstate trips and lots of pressure. They say it takes a village to raise a child and this week I am very grateful for my village. My niece and nephew, my sisters, my Mum & stepfather and my kids all drawing together to pull of a miracle.

 

This time last year I was in Port Fairy on a blogging trip with thanks to Great Ocean Rd tourism. Well this year my blog has led to the wonderful opportunity to be involved with a great restaurant in Sydney. Macelleria is a great restaurant with locations in Bondi and Newtown. “The Butcher who cooks for you.”

Macelleria combines the beautiful concept of restaurant quality Cape Grim beef cooked fresh for you at your table and accompanied by a healthy and socially conscious selection of side dishes. My kind of food. Take a look at their website and their social media pages because I am sure that you are going to love what they are doing as much as I do.

So yes, life is a many splendored thing with highlights and low lights and everything in between.

Today I played two square with my 5 year old and drank tea with my 12 year old and was just grateful for these moments.

Tomorrow I’ll be a little bit older and looking forward to what might come next.

Dani xx

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